I was just on this wonderful retreat. Each year for the past 6 years I go to the Sisters of St Francis in Sylvania Ohio for several days (this year it was 5 days.) They have these two one room cabins (called Hermitages) which you can rent. There is no TV, internet, or phone. They have all your basic needs covered, including a little kitchenette for you to cook your meals. On the campus, there are areas of artwork which you can spend time with and reflect, a lovely chapel which is a model of the chapel St. Francis built in Italy, and a Church. Basically my retreat is my own. I go with a bag full of books, never knowing where God will lead me. I love to read about the Saints and this year I found a book by Pope Francis "Walking with Jesus" which is a collection of some of his Homilies and general audience sermons. All this reading helps guide me, but I have found that the greatest time is when I just sit quietly, not talking, not thinking, but simply be with the Lord.I know there are times I get too caught up in my prayers - trying to justify my prayer, trying to say the right thing - adding words. Have pity on me, heal them, forgive me, open me, protect my grandchildren --- all are simple request just like Bartimaeus - a blind man sitting along the road to Jericho who cried out as Jesus was passing by "Son of David, have pity on me." (Mark 10:46) But more than requests, they are a sign of faith.
Faith comes when we have built a relationship with the Lord and fully trust in his compassion. It is the "something" which we can lean on when nothing we do will help - when we finally release everything to God, and trust him. This relationship takes our effort - to spend time with the Lord, talk with him, cry on his shoulder and thank him for the simple things in our lives. We don't need eloquent words to ask God for help - we simply must ask, and know that God is in charge. It is when we let go of our fears and allow our hearts and souls to take charge. Our Lord wants us to trust him - to love him - to recognize his working in us.
And this takes me back to my retreat - In Pope Francis' book - there was a line that hit right to the heart of things. "God never tires of forgiving us; we are the ones who tire of seeking his mercy." (Walking with Jesus, page 16) And as I reflected on that one little line - the tears began to flow and I found myself saying those two simple little words "forgive me." God's mercy is so great - our human minds cannot grasp the magnitude of it. But, unfortunately we stop asking for it, we stop asking for forgiveness. I've come home from retreat with a desire, each and everyday to ask the Lord to "forgive me" and "grant me your mercy." Simple prayers, yes - but ones with great impact on my relationship with the Lord.
So, I ask you to join me each day - stop what you are doing - and simply pray "forgive me."
