He Sighed from the Depth of His Spirit

As a kid, when I had done something really bad, my Mom would look at me and sigh.  And I knew what that meant; I was in trouble – big trouble.  The sigh was a precursor to the lecture and punishment that was to come.  I always dreaded when I heard that sigh.

In Monday’s Gospel (Mark 8:11-13) we hear the Pharisees once again badgering Jesus for a sign.  The Gospel writer tells us in response, Jesus “sighed from the depth of his spirit.”  I don’t know about you, but that sounds like a pretty heavy and critical sigh.

This passage has had me thinking since I read it.  Sighing is one of those reactions that can have many meaning – it can be (as in my Mom’s case) in frustration, anger or sadness; it can come from loneliness or despair; but, it can also be one of happiness and satisfaction (think of the teen girls in the movies who sigh when they see the dreamboat captain of the football team.)  So, which one describes Jesus’ sigh?

I believe we can find a clue in the first reading.  We know that the first reading, which is from the Old Testament, is chosen to accompany the Gospel to add insight.  The reading with Monday’s Gospel was from Genesis 4:1-15, 25.  In this passage we hear about Cain and Abel – Abel brings God the best of his first fruits, Cain just picks something out – not necessarily the best and is upset that God was more pleased with Abel’s gift than Cain’s.  God sees this and approaches Cain – trying to encourage him to do better and reminding him that “sin is a demon lurking at the door.”  He also tells Cain that he is perfectly capable of becoming sin’s master instead of it’s slave.  But we all know what happens there - Cain kills Abel out of jealousy.

So, in light of the Genesis reading – I imagine Jesus’ reaction is one of frustration and sorrow.  “We still don’t get it.”  We ask for signs when the source of all life is standing right in our midst.  Mankind has not changed much from Cain to that very moment – we want what we want – and we expect to receive it – even though we might be too blind to see we already have it.

Like Cain, the Pharisees do not “get it” – which brings me to today – and I believe I do the same thing - I don't always "get it."  We can pray, pray, pray for the things we want – but we do not see what we already have – right in our hands.  Each Sunday (and some weekdays - you know weekday Masses are not just for the old) we receive the Body of Christ – the source of all love, joy, peace, mercy and hope – placed there right in our hands.  The things we want are of this world, and though we feel they are critical – in the big scheme of life – they really are not.  What is important is how we choose to live our life – one of demanding signs or one living in the joys of our God.

I don’t know about you, but today, I’m choosing joy.