Everyone Else is Doing It

I recently was listening to talk radio, and someone said "everyone else is doing it" - this immediately took me back to my teenage years when I was trying to talk my mother into letting me do something.  My argument would usually include the phrase "everyone one else is doing it" and my mother's classic response was "well, I suppose if everyone else was running around naked, you would want to do it too."  Now, this makes me laugh today, then as a teenage girl longing to fit in with all my friends it only frustrated me.

In this past weekend's Gospel (Mark 10:17-30)  we hear about the rich man who asked Jesus what more could he do to insure he would inherit eternal life.  I'm sure he was thinking - I have done everything just as everyone else; I have followed the law to the "T" - I should be good.  But Jesus words stunned him - to go sell everything - and then give the money to the poor.  The Gospel tells us he went away sad for he had many possessions.

We are told through so much media what everyone else is doing and that we should be doing it too - what car to drive, were to go for vacation, how to host the perfect party, how our kids should dress.  These messages come to us from various locations - through TV advertising, magazines, TV shows and social media - and sometimes from our very friends and family members (I know I've been guilty of that.)  We all post what we are doing right (even if it's not the complete truth) - how everything is going great - and we are giving false hope to those who are not able to do exactly what "everyone else is."  As a young bride - the first question that was asked of me, was "when were we going to start having children" - God had other plans for my motherhood and I was not able to have biological children (we adopted) - and this frustrated everyone around me (especially if they did not know what was going on with our infertility issues.) And it frustrated me, for I knew that it was the norm to start a family shortly after getting married - it was expected of me.  We had been married for a year - I should be pregnant.  And then when we adopted - our son was 7 years old - not a baby - again we were not doing it right.  People around us did not know how to react.  But we knew our desire was to have a child in our life - it did not matter if he was an infant, toddler, or a Kindergartener.

Jesus' word to the rich man and to us are sometimes very hard to hear.  He challenges us to not always go with the norm - to think outside the box - to following God's will and not the will of everyone around us.  These words can be scary - and they can take us into uncharted territory.  But when we do follow God's will - there comes a peace with it - no matter how everyone else may feel - we can be at peace.

So, what is God's will for our lives?  Good question - and one I don't believe to have a set answer - for it is different for each and everyone of us.  We are all given different gifts and graces from God.  Each one to help us follow his will - our spiritual tool box so to speak.  One person may be good with the elderly and finds visiting them and taking them Communion is very fulfilling while others would not. Some may find happiness in raising a healthy happy family full of children - others would go crazy (I would have been one of those going crazy - thank God for unanswered prayers.)  We need to each find our place in God's world - we each need to find how to uses the gifts and graces God has blessed us with and we all need to find peace that it's okay to not "do what everyone else is doing."  There comes a time when we must grow in unusual places.  How to do this - prayer lots and lots of prayer.

And we need to find a way to accept those who do not do things as society has told us - for we are all God's children.